€25 Brazilian Wax In Galway

Schleck II

Eccoci di nuovo al nostro usuale appuntamento con il ciclismo bizantino, il più amato anche dagli infedeli.

Settimana ricca di gare e di risultati per i nostri ragazzi che finalmente sembrano trovare una forma degna dei notevoli emolumenti che i lanisti pagano annualmente per annoverarli tra le loro fila.

Come sempre gli eunuchi sono stati sguinzagliati tra le varie province dell' Impero Romano di Occidente per riportare fedelmente i fatti più interessanti, eccovi perciò i resoconti appena estratti dalle buste di pergamena ( e abbelliti nella forma poetica dal vostro augusto patriarca).

Tour de Picardie

Allegro French tour which takes place in Picardie, the land known mainly for being the birthplace of Eddy Seigneur, Alexandre Dumas and Jean Racine, and therefore naturally fond of melodrama granguignoleschi.

Our remaining faithful to local tastes have decided to stage a mock kidnapping of mass before the start (with Amorison in the Iron Mask) going to lose their punch in time. Result: none of our approaching to any worthy place! Piovosissima be noted that during the third stage of the mussel Steven Cozza fell decisively in a stream where remained to filter Beat until help arrives. A few weeks stop for him.

International Rheinland-Pfalz Rundfahrt

A race where there are practically all our boys fighting for a place in the sun (or wind considering the weather conditions): Goths, Gauls, Brittany Franks and gave battle on the streets to snatch a possible renewal of contract with the grim lanista.

We see step by step

1Tappa: Festival sprint strapaesana vedeve that our right at the foot of the podium: Steven Caethoven the 4th, 5th and 6th Harald André Greipel Starzengruber. Close but no points.

Step 2: volatone still confusing and even a medal of wood for us with the fourth place of André Greipel.

Step 4: Bad luck continues to pour on our cyclists such as showers of this charming (?) Area of \u200b\u200bGermany. In this case we place a 5 th place with Harald Starzengruber (free of Shakespearean Matzenbacher)

Step 5: The apotropaic gestures while useless eunuchs (useless for lack of substance ...) are used instead of something with Steven Caethoven gill that a good 3rd place and offers three points to his risicatissimi lanista. Nothing to do in the final standings Starzengruber with 24 ° of our best (but they are sprinters ..) followed far enough from Greipel, O'Loughlin and mysterious Stubbe.

Tour of Japan (Cipango)

We get very far fragmentary information from this race that sees running slant-eyed devils and heretics of every kind and sort. However, patriarchy is never without resources and, thanks to the willing eunuchs and a bit 'of good old epatomamnzia, Photius once again can show the progress of our heroes.

First, the Tour of Japan does not have the precise locations because much depends on the permissions of both local and from the events of the Shogun various Oni who often haunt the streets.

For this reason, all stages have the same name Akataka-Ataka (from here to here).

Step 1: Sinuosissimo path between the local lords of the manor that only cyclists Indians could decipher. The wily Zak Dempster (sent into the fray with a bowl of rice and a bottle of sake from his paron) was put to the ribs of two yellow devils could recuparare third place is worth 2 points. Not bad, if only for the effort.

Step 2: Climb a mountain harsh indeed that at the end turned out to be a volcano in full operation by deleting the middle to follow the caravan of runners. A young Kazakhstan won the stage, but immediately behind him came the genial Aurelien Passeron that thanks to his bike with wheels to avoid the effect of asbestos could Pompeii. First points for the annual new Marco Polo cycling.

Step 3: Escape five brave (including the indefatigable Passeron!) Siena realizing acceleration forced by a gang of Pachinko players in protest against any sports activity on land that is not the Japanese Pachinko itself. The protest turned into a brawl when the group met with a mob of extremists tamagochi. In the confused Passeron sprint took the 5th place, leaving the victory all'Italiano Masciarelli.

Intanto il giro continua...

Giro d'Italia
Il giro dell'Impero Romano di Occidente è una gara che occupa gli alti prelati del ciclismo e generalmente non riserva molte soddisfazioni ai giovani che si spaccano la schiena per fare un po' di esperienza, ma quest'anno le cose sembrano differenti ( a partire dal fatto che Naibò non è maglia nerama tranquillamente 66°).

Fino a questo momento si sono messi in luce principalmente Ariel Richeze e Andy Schleck con prestazioni davvero notevoli.

L'argentino volante si è piazzato: 5° nella seconda tappa e 3° nella terza stage, delivering his viziatissimo manager with 13 points. Then not happy with the good impression he tried to put the icing on the cake Petacchi slammed into the barricade, the task remained unfinished, unfortunately, also thanks to the protection of the other sprinters who love the generosity of the break nell'elargire victories.

Andy Schleck is doing instead of feeling!

In the first stage of climb (well say slight slope uphill ... but given the stuff listed in the Tour this year who made the selection ...) good Andy has taken the plunge: get 5th in the group of the best but then not happy with what he did, he attacked like a madman to the Shrine of the Guard!

Good Photius could not believe his eyes after the thrust upward against the odious Di Luca! At the end of this stage the young fool (defined as one that says "I knew the climb but I felt good ....") arrived exhausted but the 3rd (13 points total spoils) and with an enviable position in the standings. We'll see how far resists ...

Rank

Cellars Tabarez 490

Degustation

pate du Richelieu 435 183 Pavè

Coffee Bar Ethiopia 152 127
Mutombo
Meanwhile, the eunuchs were launched to search for Eddy Ratti The now ex-cannibal.

Does A Polyp In The Bladder Need To Be Removed

The Magical Mystery Tour!


Yesterday

special session of the Board of Augustali after verification made on the Carthusian Liber Kyklistòs showing some possible flaws in the system of assigning points.

In a strong opening address, highlighted the differences between Paul Silenziario Giri Giri and three weeks for a week, ritendo scandalous award of the same points to the winner. The

was immediately echoed by Prisco Panion with a scorching indictment of the lack of mathematical competence Helvetians (all accompanied by 249 plates of astrological calculation to verify the assertions) that equate Eneco and Vuelta.

Now in its fourth administrative attention to this sign on your Patriarch intervened with his usual fairness by creating a new category of points just for the two long rides (that already exist Gallic tour last year).

applause, Fast canonization of two hermits Cyrenaica and all the spa.

For lanista point out that this creation only leads to the consequence of removing a bit of points to the poor and Kreuziger Schleck (indeed too much rewarded in the first instance), but it does not affect the ranking of poverty view the results so far obtained in the Pro Tour stage.

Late evening a messenger arrived directly from the land of Prester John complained about the failure to allocate 3 points to Rigoberto Uran Uran-for concluding the tour of Romandie, as always your bubble quickly resolved with patriarchal and cooperation pact between the two empires.

Let the races:

IV days of Dunkirk race
estimated importance to note the good weather that characterizes nearly all of its editions. Despite earlier not particularly brilliant in this race for the colors of Albion (remember some inglorious flight in the 40s) this year finally came the revenge of the witch by Cavendish!

things first

Step 1: Stopwatch flying under water that leaves little room for virtuosity lenticular, the valiant Cornu (Cantine Tabarez) tears a Tempone seems decisive, but then the track dried and the ' huge Belgian has to settle for 7th place. Surprisingly, 4th (especially surprised him) Niki "Storm" Terpstra apt that the right wax and kept miraculously sober: no point but avoided the pillory on the square of the Hippodrome.

Stage 2 of the wizard that starts the show, even mocked by the flight of the day (by a Pole of Slytherin) is able to adjust the group sprint. Lucciconi its paron did not see a cyclist in the first three from the plague of Anatolia.

3Tappa : Continue the Magical Mystery tour of the British druid. Here he devoted himself to the sport of choice for sprinters: the exploits of the Milram train!

So, playing the part to perfection often worn on stage by his sensei spiritual McEwen, the sorcerer speed past everyone for their second win of the season

Step 4: The Wizard remains tethered in a grove because of Ent a spiteful that ruined part of the frame, so the good Stegmann takes off and governs the whole group in the sprint. Bravo!

Step 5: Step tortuous with some ups and downs that the giant Belgian Cornu interprets to wonder just putting on the flight. At the end must yield to the stage victory Ladagnous but manages to wear the leader's jersey for a second.

Stage 6 (already renamed Intrigues and Spells). The start of the race is characterized by remarkable escape of Evan "effervescing" Oliphant who manages to reach a maximum of 4 minutes ahead. Great palpitation for the King of Marches brick, but unfortunately the group has to fight for the leader's jersey and can not leave room for the mighty elephant.

So the group will meet just in time for the intermediate sprint where Ladagnous beats Cornu (and takes over the top for a second!) The decision of the race is postponed to the final sprint.

Part Siedler and with the Milram Zabel and everything seems fine, but at 50 meters from the finish with a "Bamf" suddenly appears to be the wizard who beat the old master (indeed not so decided in the sprint).

Cornu was penalized 10 seconds for the sprint irregular (ie for having illegally tried to do the sprint against a Frenchman) and this guarantees the French Ledagnous a victory easier. Scandal in the stands and among protospatharios! But we know not of francs you can trust ever. Cornu took home 80 points but the viziatissmo paron Ricardao devastates the small stage of the jury to Power Ranger shots.

Rank
Cellars Tabarez 464

Degustation

pate du Richelieu 430 180 Pavè

Coffee Bar Ethiopia 150 127

Mutombo

Allergy Medicine Taken Morning Or Night

Romandie and Vendee

Hello to all, or loyal subjects of the Byzantine emperor! !

As the summer approaches on the beautiful walls of the palace Bucoleon, your Photius is locked in his cell to check the resconti eunuchs who come from all over the globe to be able to valid the results of the update fearless cyclists.

And despite the hard work, the passion and dedication of a unknown number of slaves patriarchy a little effort 'to keep up with the races (all the fault of the excommunication of many bubbles that we have to draw every day).

Anyway here is the report of the last races.

tour Vendee: Vendee Earth difficult, not only for the elevation of the race (but tough), but also for a past never completely forgotten the fact that change often rooting along the road. Unlikely that a pro-cyclist and anti-clerical revolutionary has happened here (Bernard Babeuf tried it a few years ago but mysteriously disappeared during a stage transfer). And after all it is easily understandable in the atrocities committed by the army against the population Gallic, light years away from the rightness of the Byzantine scholar.

However, the race took place with many problems.

Vendemiao At the start the 2001 Sprint did not attend because of a few horse heads chopped off in making a smooth flagship, Benoit Sinner was immediately stopped and questioned because of the name on the Old Testament for a couple of hours and Finally, Jukka Vastaranta preferred distance themselves in a local trattoria. Result: Not a punticino!

Tour de Romandie: I say eunuchi che questa è la gara più importante per la preparazione del giro, anche in considerazione del fatto che quest'anno la Romandia è stata visitata per la prima volta dal misterioso Tatzelwurm ( di cui si fa menzione nella Miscellanea di Annotazioni storiche di Panfila). In ogni caso ecco il succinto racconto

1 Tappa: Nel prologo subito onore per i nostri colori con il mostruoso secondo posto di Roman "TGV" Kreuziger. La scoperta del viziatissimo paròn della Cantine Tabarez continua a stupire e dopo gli ottimi risultati fatti registrare nelle altre crono brevi infila anche questa ennesima perla( e sono 15 punti). E gli altri ?? Il migliore è Andy Schleck 40°. I said all

Step 2: Volatone in friendship with a side of cheese fondue. Vince Fothen (smarter than the other has to understand the tortuous path) while waiting for our save the leg of the mountains (or the evening in a restaurant?).

Step 3: You can deny a stop in McEwen? Of course not! So here in this beautiful friendship volatona where, unlike the previous Abakoumov (Cellars of Tabarez) can negotiate a good 7th place (no points, but it showed up). Evan Oliphant presents a number of bells on the bike and a sudden "When the saint ..." before being acclaimed crowd and hired by a local restaurant.

Step 4: Part a leak under the water and swing as there is no Steven Cozza thinks the grouper fish Beppu to give a touch to the race! He leaves with two Italians for the first time since the Medieval Towns find common ground for agreement cheat Cipango courageous rider.

Beppu Victim of the unusual agreement settles for second place, not without some rancor in the evening as the winner received an unpleasant visit by King Ghidora

Step 5: First stage edge (under the usual water) and the shining talent of the former Thomas Dekker gone to other categories. But if Cellars Tabarez had to miss the powerful Dutch consoles himself with the 7th place of Andy Schleck and the admirable keeping Kreuziger (only lost 48 seconds).

Step 6: Once stopwatch! While the past dominates (Dekker wins the final classification) of the new advances with Tabarez Cellars Kreuziger and Schleck coming in ten in the general classification (specifically Kreuziger 6 ° and 8 ° to 120 points for 96 !!!!). Schleck Conclude the festival, the 24 points of 26 ° Remi Di Gregorio.

With the Tour de Romandie Tabarez Cellars (which we devote a photo of the owner-taverners) has finally as the only opposing candidate for Sheena Easton. The challenge is closed to others? Wait until the season is long and surprises are always around the corner (such as excommunication).

Rank

Cellars Tabarez 446

Sheena Easton Degustation Richelieu
Bar Ethiopia 426 150 127
Coffee Mutombo

pate du Pavè 127

Upcoming races: Four days of Dunkirk, Tour of Italy, Int Rheinland Pfalz-Rundfahrt, Trophée des Grimpeurs - Polymultipliée

What Does My Driver's License Number Stand For?

Effervescing Oliphant!

increasingly difficult for your poor Patriarch able to follow the many races in this time of year they happen without interruption, if you add to this a certain laziness that leads to my spring auguste limbs more often at his desk at the spa that you can imagine the mountain of work that accumulates in my cubicule.
However, after a contentious meeting of the Diadochi coat color of the Emperor, here I am ready to report briefly on lanista races. Rund um Köln


Race Gothic submit to the street level that many of our young students who enjoy the particular challenges in local forests. Last year the starters were able to give valid proof of himself, not as quest'anno, che anzi denuncia una netta involuzione di risultati. Nessuno dei pupilli riusciva ad entrare nei punti, il migliore era infatti il buon Peter Velits 23°( attardato dalle numerose tagliole di cui desiderava verificare l'efficacia), seguito dalla turbina di Rostock 27°e da Evan "Effervescing" oliphant 37°. Troppo poco per una gara decisamente alla portata di un piazzamento !!

Giro del Trentino
Una delle gare geograficamente più complesse del calendario ciclistico in quanto si svolge in Trentino su strade completamente pianeggianti ( e non è che ce ne siano poi molte). La situazione è talmente disperata che quest'anno gli organizzatori sono riusciti perfino a far arrivare una tappa in Lombardy! But basically in a world where the Tour de France starts in London you can expect everything.
Giro del Trentino in addition to being geographically ambiguous race is always hunting our favorite cannibal. Also this year there were promises to the usual spanzata of flyers and Scattoni but unfortunately the black Campionissimo crisis continued.
seventy and ninth of almost 15 minutes behind the winner (picked up where then? Because there was not a climb!) Is the sad report of the general classification.
We arrived at Sunset Boulevard, or is there hope that the sample resume onusto forces. It will, of course his current team does not help much.

Congratulations instead to Maximilian "Axl" Richeze who takes home a great victory (and 15 points) to give the viziatissimo paron Ricardao.
In the fourth stage of the Argentine sprinter managed to slip between the opponents and put in nothing less than row Paolini. Usual
invasion of dog-headed monkeys (with 15-minute fixed camera upside down in the final commentary) because of the misguided attempt to pronounce the third arrived (Krzysztof Szczawinski) by the commentator.

Achterhes Profronde Albert van Drenthe
The race begins from the name to test the strength of the rider (try to say this without you catch your breath!) And then tests the ability to concentrate winding on a course as flat as a billiard ball! Our cyclists
snubbed the event, but carelessly left open the cage cab Evan "Effervescing" Oliphant, who certainly did not miss the opportunity to get a good scamper on his shiny new bicycle with basket and bell.
So, Evan and zigzagging ringing like crazy could throw in some of the main polder near favorites in the final sprint and tore a 14 th place that's well worth 7 points. Not bad for Pesciarone king, but now that has to start looking for a good Oliphant that is dispersed after the race.

Henninger Turm race
The beer is a time Gothic era of cycling and our boys always more interested in beer at the races could not possibly fail to line up at the start.
Under a shining sun, unusual, indeed, the race lived on a gigantic fugone with all the best teams in cycling Central Europe. Thanks
all'ignavia of Milram (which lacks Freire did not know who to bring to the finish) the flight proceeded to the end placid and good Sinkiewitz could taste the victory (not until they have crashed into the photographers convinced of having to do one more lap !)
Our maiden in a crisis of results (nothing to Liege where the best was Andy Schleck 46 °) were trying to save the honor, but only managed to take Burghardt points (11 ° and are 11 points if a palindrome).
Behind him the absolute vacuum (97 ° Richeze, Oliphant 104 °, 183 ° and 197 ° Matzanbacher velits).
A strict examination of the bottles revealed the presence of isotonic fluids is not made from hops that could have affected the overall result (and that has made Matzanbacher recite some sonnets Dionysian in questionable taste during the official ceremony).

For the moment is all but expect a quick guide to the Tour of the Vendee (with thorny religious issues attached), the Tour of Romandie and the Tour of Switzerland Tuscany. Your
Photius back to the spa to meditate on the miracles of San Cipriano.